Welcome Back!

Due to Uni Break I feel I again have enough free time to help the people of Perth the clean up there act! Whilst I've been away studying I've not seen any improvement in the Perth Social Scene that people are willing to clean up there act. So by popular demand or not, Lovers and Lobbers will be returning for a bit of winter fun, YAAAAAAAAY!

"8. Dancing till you're all hot sweaty is easily the most enjoyable way to stave off the winter chill." (SHAPE - 2009) And the best way to keep you dancing all night is a tummy full of biccies, well it seems that was the trend last weekend at SHAPE. Can you not just support the club a little bit and approach the bar instead of the toilet seat?

Anyway, here is a snippet of the inspiration for re-opening the blog:
Images coursty of Space Ship News at the Future Music Festival 2009

Like I said before the blog will only be open for the duration of uni break. So calm the fuck down and stop trying to sue us! If you don't want your employer/mummies/daddies/gfs/bfs/anyone else you think cares about you, to see you in the state you are in either clean up your act or get a sense of humour and learn to laugh at yourself.

Lovers and Lobbers
xx

Some more material for 7news

Lobbing probably isn't one of them....

I don't think I need to make any further comments, I think you all get the picture!

Lovers and Lobbers
xx

Ever wondered what 1/4 of a pill could do?

Mike Hunt: "Wow your friend is really fucked up..."

Friend of Subject Below: "Yeah she had her first quarter of a pill"

 How do you actually quarter a pill? I mean seriously, its hard enough to half a panadol let alone a quarter biccy which is half the size!

The Night was spent in a beautiful ecstasy at SHAPE, as the hair do she spend hours perfecting was covered with sweat, the make up she applied dripped from her face, the teeth god blessed her with narrowly avoided being chipped by chomping.

And no that is not a glow stick around her neck, its a whistle. Its a good chewing device and you can make off beat sounds. Clearly the new and ultimate lobber accessory!


Though she wasn't displaying many lobber looks she definiatly was in the "loving stage" of the WHOLE QUATER of the pill for most of the night.

Would you believe that the photos were taken in that order.
I can prove it if you don't believe me.

I guess these four went quarters in 'the' pill, youuuu big spenders youuuuuu!

Though this guy didn't get any cos they ran out but I think he was pulling the piss out of her more than I was, instafriends :D
Even the DJ was too embarrassed to be seen with her or her friends, they were abruptly kicked out of the booth, dang, cos they were like totally sick cunt dancerzzzz and mixerzzzzz.

Lets never forget this face, may it be burned into your brain like the image of the twin towers collapsing. The lesson is kidz (if you somehow managed to miss it) DON'T TAKE DRUGS! No matter how small the quantity, it will always end in embarrassment and public stoning if I am present.

Though I can't prove she was off her head, but judging from the above photos, lets hope she was! 

Lovers and Lobbers

xx

Trevor Loveys at SHAPE

Last night I went to the deen then continued onto SHAPE, there was no shortage of rankness exhibited at both venues. Though in this post I will be concentrating on the new clientele of SHAPE has managed to attract it's definitely a turn for the worse! I'd have to say that last night for a one night stand the deen had nothing on SHAPE. Here are some fine examples of the new SHAPE crowd....

We shall start with the loving:

Not only did these guys make out throughout the night,
They also managed to rule the dance floor with their sexy salsa and bump'n'grind!
Pill in affect...Pill wears off...

Classic Lobber Looks

The Sniff:

The Embrace:The Chew:

The Charger:
Another thing SHAPE was doing a way shitter/ranker job of was whore dancing.

The patrons of SHAPE weren't going to let the rankness end when they left the club:

If only 95% of the patrons ended up like this (possibly dead from choking on their own vomit) the world would be a better place for us all! This is only a sample of the many people I captured disgracing themselves at SHAPE,unfortunately there were too many photos to post.

Positives of the night:
- Spending $30 on HJs and Kebabs
- Finding out one of my friends, who could have definitely featured on this blog many many a time, has decided to stop popping pillzzzzzzz
- Finding out that people who attend hip-hop-happenin' clubs like SHAPE are no better than those who attend the deen

Lovers and Lobbers
xx

Future Music Festival

Once again the typical festival catch 22 situation reared its head; the acts were great, the people were gross. Mind you greatness of the acts outweighed the grossness of the people and without any gross people I wouldn't have a blog!

This guy's shirt represented every punters thoughts:

YOUR BRAIN!

WALRUS - is one lolly pop not enough?
Does it work on a ratio of pills to lollypops?

The usual lobbing activites were in no short supply...
These two asians were dry humping throughout grand master flash, only stopping to "clear their heads"
The Chew times two, yeah baby!
When out of pop, the stick can and will be used instead.

There was also a new lobber talent on show - Multitasking!
This guy is doing a really really great job of:
Lobbing, Being on the Phone, Drinking and Standing Up

Other Lobber talents...
Congrats Lobbers! As I see being on top of a bin a step in the right direction, your just that little bit closer towards being in the bin, your rightful place!

Positives of the Day and Night:
- Free Ticket from my mummabear
- My brother getting a blood nose from the security
- Pharrell inviting girls on stage then being a total cunt to them (i.e one tried to take a photo with him and he knocked her camera out of her hands onto the floor!)

Lovers and Lobbers
xx

Good Vibrations

Yes, it was time to get dusty at none other than...And with a little inspiration for the lovely folks of Perth I have decided to release an official set of new festival rules:
Don't take off your shirt if your even semi fat, have back pimples, if you are not really tanned as at the end of the day your sunburn will make people cringe, are not willing to accept the fact that people will try to steal your shirt from its new found home (tucked into your shorts).
Don't ever dry root in public.
I presented this lass with a business card and she replied
"but its ok (to act like this).... he's my bf!"
THAT IS NEVER OK... OK!

Don't sniff on the asses of toy pandas which you have soaked in vicks the night before.

Don't take too many (if any...) pillzzzzzzz

I think that is enough rules for the rank of Perth to try to process for one sitting now I'd like to highlight some of the more positive PUNTERS (in reviews of late I have seen this word being used excessively and I am in love with the connotations in which it draws to festival goers). Below are some people I would consider to be PUNTERS...


Highlights of my day:
Spending $0
Meeting Sam Sparro in the Ladies toilets at the after party and getting to see his dirty Sanchez mustache up close!
Saying punters every 3 to 4 minutes
Getting another photo with KIM to add to my collection
Witnessing french rap (live!) at the after party
Loosing my voice
Yelle was amazing!

BIG NIGHT OUT

On Saturday, 31st January a friend and I had a BIG NIGHT OUT.
Firstly attending the cream of Perth's clubs: the deen, paramount, rise, mint and bar open.
We first chose to enter the rise (due to getting free entry cards from ravers) where I captured these lucky lobbers on digital...

Where else but rise would people be so unashamed of themselves?
Though on a positive note the rise lived up to its reputation and played at least 3 quality raver anthems in the 30 minutes we were there. Rise really is unveiling a revolution the common follower must have a complete disregard for anything that is attractive (faces, clothing, scent) and must embody this at all times.


We then moved on the mint, a part of rise dance club. The atmosphere here was very different with gangstar beats bangin' and all the hotties grindin' creating there was plenty of room for some loving snaps...
It was an a.m.a.z.i.n.g experience, which I would have never ever paid an entry fee for!


We then continued onto the paramount, there was no shortage of loving at Perth's well known club for a booty call. Example below...
Positive of going to the paramount: we didn't have to wait in line as some people who attended our school were in the front of the line (though they were denied entry we still manage to get in instantly) once inside we got flashing midori glasses and mad cunt bling midori necklaces (for freeee!) We threw ice on people who were clearly too hot to handle. Then we found gold, a unopened tampon next to the bar, of course we did what any normal peron would we dived to the floor armed with a glass of water, plunged that baby and threw it at boys that tried to grind our legs.


Then we proceeded to the deen and found a black raver...
Sweeeeeeet!

It was now time for the first and last outlay of money for the night as we proceeded to Bar Open as we only possessed a 2 for 1 entry card we were hit up for a $4 fee each, as there was only 4 other patrons in the club (making a total of 6 people) there was no hope of any quality pictures. Though we made a few song requests and the DJ denied our requests "as they were not suitable for this dance floor" we replied with the fact "we are the dance floor!" he then played our music :D


Finally, we were fed up with these free clubs and moved on the SHAPE (for an event named Big Night Out, oh how fitting!) and the people of Perth continued to amaze me...

Oh you sexy thaaaaaang you

the chew: featured above

The highlights of SHAPE (apart from the above): free entry, amazingly cold juice (also free), pirouettes, meeting hot chip

Best things about the night:
I only spent $4.00 and ate a big bag of chips.

Lovers and Lobbers
xx